Odd and Misunderstood

On Tuesday school starts again at the U of C. I’m back in 4 classes each semester and will finally be getting my degree after having started almost 10 years ago. It’s been an interesting 9 years and here are some things I’ve learned/done in those past 9 years:

1) Lost my mom

2) Lost my grandfather

3) Learned how to play ultimate frisbee

4) Taught myself how to build websites

5) Met a lot of amazing people

6) Lived in 3 provinces and 8 different places

7) Attended 4 universities in 3 provinces

Had 14 jobs

9) Lost some friends – made lots of new friends

10) Completely changed my career focus

11) Discovered my passion in life

12) Got 3 speeding tickets

13) Bought my first car

14) Had my first love

15) And have been a part of many amazing trips, groups, parties, adventures and events

I wouldn’t change it all for anything. As hard as some of it has been, it’s made me who I am today. Very cliche to say but it’s true. The worst thing ever and the best thing ever happened to me – losing my mom and finding my passion. Knowing that she would be happy with what I’m doing makes it all worth it, what I’ve gone through to get here. Sometimes it’s nice to look back on a period of your life and reflect. You could almost consider it to be an era of my life ending and a new one starting. But really there’s multiple parts of my life right now so just one part of that is going to be over when I graduate in April. It’s been a good run, I’ve learned a lot and still have a lot left to learn. Here’s to living life!

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I’ve been meaning to blog about this happening for a while now. Some of you know what happened; most don’t. I figured I should write a bit about what happened since the majority of us in our lifetime will never be a witness to a robbery and there are a few things to be learned from it.

The day was Thursday, October 2, 2008 (technically the Friday since it was past midnight) and I had just left Paul Filek’s show at the Balance Lounge in Calgary, Alberta.

As normally happens, when I’m up late, I get a craving for junk food. So, I stopped at the Petro Canada in Riverbend to pick up some snacks. I had collected a few things and walked up to pay when out of the corner of my eye, I saw a guy walk in the door. I put the snacks on the counter when I noticed that this guy had a ski mask on and was holding a gun, pointing it at me. As he walked towards me, he yelled at me to “Get down on the ground.” So, I put my hands up and laid face first on the floor of the Petro Canada. While I’m lying there this guy proceeds to steal a whole bunch of smokes and money from the clerk. In the back of my mind I’m thinking “that gun didn’t look real.” It looked too flimsy and I had thoughts about getting up and tackling the guy – I was bigger than he was – but on the chance that it was a real gun, I didn’t want the clerk to be shot for some money and smokes so I stayed on the ground.

After the robber left, I got up and the clerk was freaking out and was in the process of dialing 911 (I had to get on the phone with them since his normally thick accent was even thicker and very hard to understand). To make a long story short, I waited there for the cops to show up. They got me to provide a description of the robber (along with 2 other witnesses who were outside at the time) and of the situation. Granted, the description which the 3 of us provided really weren’t the same. The colour of his mask, what he was wearing, and the colour of his skin – we all weren’t exactly sure.

So, given what happened after the robbery I certainly learned to be more aware of the circumstances in an intense situation like this (a la Hardy Boys) but really I won’t know if I’ve learned to be more attentive until I’m in a similar situation. Which, knock on wood, I’m not again.

Also, if a guy holding a gun (even if it fake – cops later recovered it and it was) tells you to get on the ground…you get on the ground…

Oh and I’ve also learned that eating junk food CAN be potentially bad for your health. In more ways than one.

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This is a notice that was posted in the newspaper when my grandfather, John Thomas MacLeod’s plane was shot down during the 2nd World War:

Could you imagine being a parent in the 1930’s with no internet and barely any phones? Parents might not know their son/daughter is dead/alive for days/weeks/months.

Writing from memory and being brief, my grandfather was a figher pilot in the 2nd World War. He was shot down by enemy gunfire and in order ot survive, he had to climb out onto his wing and parachute to safety. However, when he landed safely on the ground, he was captured by German soldiers and taken as a captive. He told me that he was a captive for roughly 40 days and during that time was required to sleep in a closet standing up, was fed water and bread and saw his fellow comrades executed in front of him by gunshots. He was lucky to survive and later became the father of 5 children, one of them being my mom, in my eyes, the most amazing person that I will ever know.

He passed away in April of this year and I unfortunately was not able to fly home to attend his funeral. I was in the middle of exams and my grandmother told me to stay here and study and be a good student.

I talked to my grandmother on the phone last night and it was great to hear that she is doing ok. She told me that on Sunday in church they read a brief summary of grandpa’s time in the war in a moment of remembrance for him and what he did.

Margo is up visiting grandma and in addition to visiting grandpa and mom’s gravesites, I think they are going to be attending the remembrance day ceremonies at the cenotaph. That is a cereomony I wish I was there for. Maybe next November 11.

In any case, no matter where you are or what you are doing on November 11 at 11:11am, please take a few moments and remember those who have fallen, those who are serving us and think about how different our lives would be had it not been for them.

RIP John T.

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Tuesday, November 11 is Remembrance Day in Canada. In case you forget why we take 2 minutes of silence to remember those who have died, watch this video and read the lyrics. The video/song is called A Pittance of Time, by Terry Kelly.

A Pittance Of Time 4:43
Written by Terry Kelly © Jefter Publishing – SOCAN

They fought and some died for their homeland.
They fought and some died, now it’s our land.
Look at his little child; there’s no fear in her eyes.
Could he not show respect for other dads who have died?

Take two minutes, would you mind?
It’s a pittance of time,
For the boys and the girls who went over.
In peace may they rest, may we never
forget why they died.
It’s a pittance of time.

God forgive me for wanting to strike him.
Give me strength so as not to be like him.
My heart pounds in my breast, fingers pressed to my lips,
My throat wants to bawl out, my tongue barely resists.

But two minutes I will bide.
It’s a pittance of time,
For the boys and the girls who went over.
In peace may they rest.
May we never forget why they died.
It’s a pittance of time.

Read the letters and poems of the heroes at home.
They have casualties, battles, and fears of their own.
There’s a price to be paid if you go, if you stay.
Freedom’s fought for and won in numerous ways.

Take two minutes, would you mind?
It’s a pittance of time,
For the boys and the girls all over.
May we never forget, our young become vets.
At the end of the line,
It’s a pittance of time.

It takes courage to fight in your own war.
It takes courage to fight someone else’s war.
Our peacekeepers tell of their own living hell.
They bring hope to foreign lands that hate mongers can’t kill.

Take two minutes, would you mind?
It’s a pittance of time,
For the boys and the girls who go over.
In peacetime our best still don battle dress
And lay their lives on the line.
It’s a pittance of time

In peace may they rest,
Lest we forget why they died.
Take a pittance of time.

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In Flanders fields the poppies blow
Between the crosses, row on row,
That mark our place; and in the sky
The larks, still bravely singing, fly
Scarce heard amid the guns below.

We are the Dead. Short days ago
We lived, felt dawn, saw sunset glow,
Loved, and were loved, and now we lie
In Flanders Fields.

Take up our quarrel with the foe:
To you from failing hands we throw
The torch; be yours to hold it high.
If ye break faith with us who die
We shall not sleep, though poppies grow
In Flanders Fields.

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For the month of November, I will be growing a mustache and raising money for a charity called Movember that promotes the awareness of prostate cancer. Some fast facts about prostate cancer:

• Every year around 24,700 Canadian men are diagnosed with prostate cancer and about 4,300 die of the disease, making it the number one cancer threat to Canadian men.
• 1 in 7 men will develop prostate cancer in their lifetime.
• All men over the age of 40 are potentially at risk and should talk to their doctor about the disease and early detection. Prostate cancer is 95% curable if detected and treated early.

Help me out by clicking the donate button and do your part in helping to save lives! I will be taking pictures of my mustache growth everyday and posting them here to show that I’m commited to the cause. I appreciate your support!

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I find it interesting that when we follow our heart it can tend to contradict what our head is saying; and vice versa. How do we truly know what is right? I like to think that what our heart says will always lead us in the right direction. I believe that passion comes from your heart and if we always do what we love (as long as it isn’t something like heroin, stealing or murder) then it will lead us in the right direction and help our life be what we want it to be. That’s pretty much the “Secret” that there was so much hype about a few years ago. There is not “secret”. Do what makes you happy and be with whom you love and the rest will follow. But what happens when you aren’t sure what that is. Or are trying to figure that out and in the process make a mistake? That’s when you start to question “Did I do the right thing?” But, as long as you do what feels right, then things will work out the way they were meant to be.

It can be a scary idea, but you need to have faith. For a while I’ve been lacking that faith. I guess it’s fairly normal to feel that loss of faith after such an amazing person, my mom, was taken from us a short 7 years ago. I still remember every detail about that night. The time everything happened. The day. The date. The events. I still find it hard to believe that she is gone and I miss her so much. I still cry every so often about her and I just want so badly to be happy. I mean, I am happy, but I want to share my happiness with someone. At times it feels like karma is out to get me. I never maliciously try to hurt anyone. I’m looking for what everyone else is I suppose. Maybe I go about it differently. Maybe I go about it the same way. All I know is that I feel close. Maybe I feel like I have it. I don’t know some days and other days I am absolutely sure. I guess all we can do is have that faith (which I feel that I am starting to regain, which is a great feeling). I went for a run the other night and I think it was the first time in a long time that I have felt so clear and fresh. Dean and I have finally started talking again. I am seeing my family more. And I have met someone. I feel like things are coming together once again but there are still so many daily tasks that need to be done (school and work) that at times I wish I had a few months off to just relax. I think when I’m graduated I will be taking that time off to just relax. Since I graduated high school, I have been either in school or working. I really haven’t had time to relax. Sure, going away for the weekend to California, Utah, Washington and BC amongst other places is great, but really when you go to play 7 games of frisbee and get home exhausted and having to get back into your normal busy lives, it’s not a vacation. At all. I truly need a vacation. I think I’m going to go to Fort Mac again at the end of November and see my cousin Natalie and my buddy Chris. I miss Natalie so much. We both have the mutual understanding that family is important and that we don’t do all we can to see each other. We are planning on a week vacation next summer in PEI; I really hope that happens.

I guess that’s what is on my mind currently. It’s been a tough week. This weekend is the last weekend of ultimate until the spring so as sad as I am to be done, it’ll be nice to have some time again for myself and the rest of my life on weekend and evenings. It’s been a long, expensive season.

Rob out.

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I wrote this on my blackberry and sent it to myself while I was at the Tom Petty concert a few weeks ago. I was watching the fans in the floor seats as they watched the show and had some thoughts about it. I’m going to leave the post exactly as I wrote it; fragmented but with complete thoughts. Feel free to add your own thoughts…

Find something to talk about that inspires people. Talk about it. Be passionate about it. Promote it. Live it. Spread it. Find something that entertains people. Find a cause that people can rally around.

What is it about musical or athletic talent that draws people to spend so much time and money on the pursuit? Since they are not actively involved in the activity, why do they become so drawn to it? Do they think they have an effect on the outcome or the overall experience by being in attendance? Do they think they can make a difference? If so, why don’t more people vote? Or donate blood? Or support real causes? Why do more people go to a rock show (and pay money) than go to a political rally for a real cause? Does practicing ignorance and keeping our distance somehow make us feel that we are not avoiding what is real because we pretend we don’t know about it?

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So a strange thing happened this weekend…

I was on a pub crawl for hallowe’en which consisted of 5 bars and many drinks. After the crawl, my buddy Dean and I, and his friend/colleague Tom (owner of the company that ran the pub crawl), went to 1410; a bar on 17th Ave for some more drinking. Now, while we were there, the lights came, the music went down, and we got ready to leave. However, being Hallowe’en I was on the lookout for costumes; good bad, and fake. Fake you ask? Well, there were a lot of cops out on the town (real and dressed up) and earlier we were talking about the point of how would you know who was who? Anyway, I noticed a table of roughly 10 people in military uniforms. Now, they all looked so good and real that I knew they couldn’t be fake. But I went over to find out regardless. I ended up talking to this group for 20 or so minutes, and found out that they had just come from a dinner ceremony at SAIT. There were a few of them who had lots of bars on their jacket representing awards and status achieved.

Now, after about 10 minutes or so, Dean came over and joined in our conversation. And during this conversation, the strangest thing happened…we both got an intense sense of pride and respect for of all these people. It could have been partly due to the fact that we had consumed many liters of fine beer, or it could have been the fact that this group was so welcoming, humble, and decorated. I definitely think it was a combination of the two, and by the end of the chat, just as we were leaving, it was almost like a chill came over my body because of what it all meant to me at that moment. I mean yes, their job is to serve and protect us, but still. They risk their lives for us knowing that many of the jobs they take could be their last.

That being said, please, on November 11, take a moment of silence for those who have fought and died for us in the past, present and the future.

And while you’re at it, watch this great song by Terry Kelly about taking a moment of silence: http://youtube.com/watch?v=KYlrrAWCTRg

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