Odd and Misunderstood

I watched The Rookie a few weeks ago; a movie starring Dennis Quaid. In it, Dennis plays the role of a teacher who chose a career and a family over baseball. However, years later he has another shot at playing in the pros. I thought it was an excellent movie but there was a line that his father said to him that really stood out for me:

“It’s ok to think about what you want to do…until it’s time to start doing what you were meant to do.”

It really hit home inside of me because I find it too easy in life to always be wanting to do something or wanting to have something (the ‘keeping up with the jones’ mentality). But, in life I feel that everyone is meant to do something. For some, it takes longer than others to find out what that is but when you do, I truly feel that you should embrace your calling, be passionate about what you do and give it everything. What you will get back from doing what you love to do will amaze you and will truly enrich your life.

Just something to think about today.

Really think about what the quote means.

Let me know if it’s as powerful to you as it was to me.

Cheers

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Compromise isn’t a bad thing. Although it can be, the type of compromise I’m talking about is healthy compromise.

First of all, what does compromise mean? According to Merriam Webster online, the definition which I find applicable is

something intermediate between or blending qualities of two different things

The reason this definition fits well is that because in any relationship (whether it’s a friendship, a family member, or your spouse) in order to be happy, there will have to be a blending of two different things. Say for example you’re dating someone who loves watching the Bachelorette but you love watching Golf – how can you blend these together? Well, you could let them have their time to watch the Bachelorette and in turn, they would let you watch golf during the final round on Sundays. This would be a hands off compromise. A more involved compromise would be her watching golf with you and you watching the Bachelorette with her. This is a healthier compromise I believe because both partners are taking an interest in each other’s lives (albeit through television, but an interest nonetheless).

With family members, a compromise could involve how often you visit, where you visit, christmas presents, etc…

With friends, a compromise could involve having someone different choose a restaurant/movie each time so the same person isn’t always getting what they want.

The amazing thing with individuals is that everyone has their own unique interests. Many times, whether in a friendship or relationship, these interests will overlap, but the beauty is that when they don’t, you do have the ability to blend those different interests together.

It will make for unexpected situations, discovering new happiness and having a different perspective on everyday things. The next time you are in a situation where a compromise seems like the only option…go for it. You might surprise yourself with how much fun you end up having!

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Do you know what I mean? Like when you eat ice cream while having a beer? Some think it’s strange. I think it makes perfect sense. Eating good things together can only equal goodness. Well, in theory right? Here are some more of the food combos I like. What are yours?

• Soda crackers and yogurt
• Peanut butter and chocolate chips sandwich
• Peanut butter and chocolate chip cookie sandwich
• Soda crackers, yogurt and chocolate easter eggs
• Soda crackers and ice cream
• Soup and pasta
• Chicken and cream of mushroom soup
• Cheese Whiz and sandwich spread (smelled like salmon…odd)
• Soda crackers dipped in chocolate pudding
• Rice cakes dipped in chocolate pudding

It’s fun trying new combinations. Leads to trying new food. And not being nervous about really eating anything. Try it sometime. And if you ever have me over for dinner, make sure you have lots of soda crackers, beer and ice cream for dessert.

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On Tuesday school starts again at the U of C. I’m back in 4 classes each semester and will finally be getting my degree after having started almost 10 years ago. It’s been an interesting 9 years and here are some things I’ve learned/done in those past 9 years:

1) Lost my mom

2) Lost my grandfather

3) Learned how to play ultimate frisbee

4) Taught myself how to build websites

5) Met a lot of amazing people

6) Lived in 3 provinces and 8 different places

7) Attended 4 universities in 3 provinces

Had 14 jobs

9) Lost some friends – made lots of new friends

10) Completely changed my career focus

11) Discovered my passion in life

12) Got 3 speeding tickets

13) Bought my first car

14) Had my first love

15) And have been a part of many amazing trips, groups, parties, adventures and events

I wouldn’t change it all for anything. As hard as some of it has been, it’s made me who I am today. Very cliche to say but it’s true. The worst thing ever and the best thing ever happened to me – losing my mom and finding my passion. Knowing that she would be happy with what I’m doing makes it all worth it, what I’ve gone through to get here. Sometimes it’s nice to look back on a period of your life and reflect. You could almost consider it to be an era of my life ending and a new one starting. But really there’s multiple parts of my life right now so just one part of that is going to be over when I graduate in April. It’s been a good run, I’ve learned a lot and still have a lot left to learn. Here’s to living life!

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The Ham Butt Problem (taken from: http://www.ted.com/talks/erin_mckean_redefines_the_dictionary.html):

Woman’s making a ham for the big family dinner. She goes to cut the butt off the ham and throw it away, and she looks at this piece of ham and she’s like, “This is a perfectly good piece of ham. Why am I throwing this away?” She thought, “Well my mom always did this.” So she calls up Mom, and she says, “Mom, why’d you cut the butt off the ham when you’re making a ham?” Her mom says, “I don’t know, my mom always did it!” So they call Grandma, and Grandma says, “My pan was too small!”

How many times have we heard this before? We do something because that’s how it’s always been done. As much as it’s efficient as a species to learn from experience, sometimes our experience can be based on factors which no longer exist or no longer influence our decisions. How best do we approach a problem without letting the past influence us too much? Simple. Think about why you do what you do. If something seems a bit off, there’s probably a reason for that.

As Einstein famously said, “We can’t solve problems by using the same kind of thinking we used when we created them.”

Live and think consciously. You never know when you’re going to be cooking a ham.

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1. I have many passions but for the past 8 years, it’s been ultimate Frisbee. I frequently dream about playing ultimate. Whenever I see a green field, I think “Wow, that would be a great field to play on.”

2. I miss my mom more than anything in the world. She passed away in 2001 when I was 18 and it still hurts to think about it. She was the most important person in my life and I can honestly say that she was the most honest, most sincere, nicest, most caring person I’ve ever met. And I was lucky enough to have her as my mom. That makes me happy but also hurts that she’s gone.

3. My first love is golf, and I miss playing so much. The last time spent with my mom was on mother’s day when we went golfing. I’ve dreamt of playing pro golf for a long time.

4. I cry during movies. Sometimes. Shhhhh.

5. I’ve never been outside of North America, but I’ve been all over Canada more than most people.

6. I drank for the first time when I was 16 at the prom party for the grade 12’s (I was in grade 11). And the first thing I ever drank was coolers. Which continued to be my bevy of choice; until I got drunk off 3 Mike’s hard when I was 18 and that was the end of coolers.

7. I haven’t weighed less than 200 pounds in almost 6 years, but I can still beat you in a race…

8. I bought my first car ever in Oct of 2007. I miss rollerblading to get around and I think since I’m living downtown now I will do more of that this summer.

9. I miss my family a lot but since it’s so expensive to fly home to the Maritimes, I haven’t gone since Dec 2006. I’m going to go this year and really want to go to our family cottage in PEI.

10. I’m extremely proud to have grown up in the Maritimes and would raise my family there in a heartbeat. I love Calgary and the people here but it’s not the same. If you’ve ever been there, you’ll know what I mean.

11. I’m a very honest person. Sometimes too honest. But that’s how I am and I will live and die by that sword.

12. I have an addiction for Haagen Daas ice cream. The 500ml variety. My favourite kind is chocolate chocolate chip and it made me very sad when they stopped selling it in Canada so whenever I’m in the US for a Frisbee tournament, I try and eat it.

13. One of my favourite things to do is to go to an open field and throw Frisbees. Like, I’ll bring 8 with me. And throw for 2 hours. By myself. It’s almost like my form of meditation. Ask me to go throw sometime and you better believe I’m there.

14. I think Frisbee golf is one of the best sports ever. Especially when me and the boys play the Majestic. Ask me about the Majestic and maybe I’ll tell you. If you’re lucky enough.

15. Rhubarb is to me what shrimp is to Bubba Gump.

16. I have built 3 of my own computers. I learned by watching other people and reading about it online. It’s fun being able to do that. But ask me about cars, and I have no clue. But I can bullshit and pretend I know what I’m talking about…sort of.

17. I have been designing websites for 6 years and my proudest accomplishment was doing the Umbilical Brothers website for 4 years. They are 2 hilarious guys from Australia who do shows all over the world and I still haven’t met them. But they might be in New York in April/May and I am planning that trip already. I am beyond pumped to meet them. And to see my good friend Deb (whom I met through the forum I built for their website).

18. I have been on television 3 times. And recognized once from an appearance. For being on Street Cents, when I was living in Halifax. I felt like a celebrity. It was pretty special.

19. I have a plastic canvas calendar sitting in my drawer which I started over 8 years ago. I want to finish it one day. It’s an Olympic themed calendar. Maybe I’ll try to have it done by the 2010 games.

20. I can throw a Frisbee longer than a football field.

21. I once shaved my whole body. It took a really long time and I probably wouldn’t do it again. But I liked how my muscles looked really defined. But I didn’t like how itchy it was when the hair started growing back in.

22. I’ve dyed my hair blond twice. Once it turned orange because I didn’t have enough dye. The other time it was very light and I liked it. Would I do it again? Why not?

23. I used to be really really funny in grade 8. Like make people fall out of their chairs laughing funny. Then in the summer between grade 8 and 9 I grew up. I remember reading Sphere by Michael Crichton and feeling more mature. I still make people laugh. But not like grade 8, oh man.

24. I love dogs. Like I can’t wait to have a house with a yard so I can get a dog. I think they’re the greatest pet ever.

25. Since I’ve been told I’m random, I’ll throw in a very random fact. I was suspended in grade 3 for one day because I pulled a knife on a kid. It was my grandfather’s and I happened to have it in my pocket. Not sure why I did it. But I haven’t done it since.

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I find it interesting that when we follow our heart it can tend to contradict what our head is saying; and vice versa. How do we truly know what is right? I like to think that what our heart says will always lead us in the right direction. I believe that passion comes from your heart and if we always do what we love (as long as it isn’t something like heroin, stealing or murder) then it will lead us in the right direction and help our life be what we want it to be. That’s pretty much the “Secret” that there was so much hype about a few years ago. There is not “secret”. Do what makes you happy and be with whom you love and the rest will follow. But what happens when you aren’t sure what that is. Or are trying to figure that out and in the process make a mistake? That’s when you start to question “Did I do the right thing?” But, as long as you do what feels right, then things will work out the way they were meant to be.

It can be a scary idea, but you need to have faith. For a while I’ve been lacking that faith. I guess it’s fairly normal to feel that loss of faith after such an amazing person, my mom, was taken from us a short 7 years ago. I still remember every detail about that night. The time everything happened. The day. The date. The events. I still find it hard to believe that she is gone and I miss her so much. I still cry every so often about her and I just want so badly to be happy. I mean, I am happy, but I want to share my happiness with someone. At times it feels like karma is out to get me. I never maliciously try to hurt anyone. I’m looking for what everyone else is I suppose. Maybe I go about it differently. Maybe I go about it the same way. All I know is that I feel close. Maybe I feel like I have it. I don’t know some days and other days I am absolutely sure. I guess all we can do is have that faith (which I feel that I am starting to regain, which is a great feeling). I went for a run the other night and I think it was the first time in a long time that I have felt so clear and fresh. Dean and I have finally started talking again. I am seeing my family more. And I have met someone. I feel like things are coming together once again but there are still so many daily tasks that need to be done (school and work) that at times I wish I had a few months off to just relax. I think when I’m graduated I will be taking that time off to just relax. Since I graduated high school, I have been either in school or working. I really haven’t had time to relax. Sure, going away for the weekend to California, Utah, Washington and BC amongst other places is great, but really when you go to play 7 games of frisbee and get home exhausted and having to get back into your normal busy lives, it’s not a vacation. At all. I truly need a vacation. I think I’m going to go to Fort Mac again at the end of November and see my cousin Natalie and my buddy Chris. I miss Natalie so much. We both have the mutual understanding that family is important and that we don’t do all we can to see each other. We are planning on a week vacation next summer in PEI; I really hope that happens.

I guess that’s what is on my mind currently. It’s been a tough week. This weekend is the last weekend of ultimate until the spring so as sad as I am to be done, it’ll be nice to have some time again for myself and the rest of my life on weekend and evenings. It’s been a long, expensive season.

Rob out.

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So my foray into answering some of the stupid questions got old fast. Like after a few days. I just wasn’t interested in answering them anymore and I doubt anyone actually read them. I sometimes wonder, like many do, how visible my blog actually is. Is there anyone who actually reads my blog? Is there anyone who keeps up to date on my site by checking it every so often? The fact that I have not gotten any comments in a long time would suggest the contrary but I am getting visits (I checked my analytics) so something is going on.

Not that I need comments, but it would be neat to read them. Would be neat to hear what people would actually like to hear and read about. I know many times a blog becomes popular because the author picks something unique and obscure to write about and via word of mouth, more people start reading the blog and checking it out more often. Other times, the author knows a great deal about a topic so people are interested in reading about that topic from an expert in that field.

Perhaps I could take a dual approach. Write about something obscure once in a while (such as pinecones and how sticky they make your hands from all of the sap and how this is a problem) and then write about something in which I know a lot about (technology, ultimate, leadership/coaching). Interesting. I think I just came up with a whole plethora of new topics for posts. Stay tuned.

Oh and leave some comments.

Peace.

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As I normally do, I stopped off at the Shell before practice to grab some energy (i.e. a Snickers bar). Today was not like a normal day however. Oh no, I only had $1.50 in change. Well, I went to buy a Snickers bar (large) and upon finding out it was $1.98, I returned the bar to the rack, let a cute girl go ahead of me and went off to find a smaller, cheaper bar. I got back in line, having quickly found one, only to have the cute girl hand the Snickers to be saying “This is the one you wanted right? It’s ok, I got it.”

I stepped back, and said simply “Really? Wow, thanks.” I wasn’t really sure what else to say. I have never seen that before, let alone have it done to me, and for such a simple act of kindness (and for only $1.98), I was honestly blown away.

Later, I was told by a friend that I should have given her a hug; next time it happens I will for sure! haha. But in this case, a simple act from a stranger put a huge smile on my face and made my day.

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What does freedom mean?

Does it relate more to the political definition: “the absence of interference with the sovereignty of an individual by the use of coercion or aggression”

Or the philosophical argument: “the idea of being free, is a broad concept that has been given numerous interpretations by philosophies and schools of thought. The protection of interpersonal freedom can be the object of a social and political investigation, while the metaphysical foundation of inner freedom is a philosophical and psychological question”

I like to rather think of freedom as doing what you want (that which makes you happy) and feeling that you can do what you want when you want (granted much of this “freedom” relates to your financial state).

This is why I feel that the above definition (in philosophical terms) is best when enhanced by the idea of financial freedom. And in that case, we shall truly be free.

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